"So You Can Take This Cookie, And ......." -311

Boy, you know your political career is really going down the tubes (pardon the pun) when national media outlets are reporting that your presidential powers will be handed off to the Vice President Cheney during your routine colonoscopy. The procedure is expected to last two hours, and be done at the presidential retreat at Camp David, Maryland by a team from the National Naval Medical Center. Security is expected to be heightened within a considerable distance of the compound due to millions of reports of angry, war weary and unemployed (English speaking) American citizens looking to shove just about anything they can get their hands on up the chief executive's ... you know. Doctors say they are not expecting to find anything out of the ordinary. My guess why? Mainly because the President has been far too busy in the last seven years sticking it up all of ours, to have any time left to get something even close to his own.